How to Receive a Diagnosis Without Losing Yourself
As a therapist, something that I have quickly noticed is that clients have a wide range of reactions to receiving a diagnosis. While some clients come to therapy almost hoping to receive a diagnosis, others cringe when I even mention the DSM-5. Over time, I have become curious about why this happens. Why do some individuals feel comforted by a diagnosis, and why do others seem reluctant and frightened?
Seeing these different reactions has led me to believe that a diagnosis can be a double-edged sword – it can help in our healing journeys, or it can really hinder and hurt us. As a mental health professional, I understand that I have a responsibility to diagnose carefully, accurately, and responsibly. I only give a diagnosis when I am confident in what I see and when I believe it will help my client. This should be the case for every therapist! At the same time, I have learned that there are ways for a client to responsibly receive a diagnosis. To break this down, I am going to suggest 3 ways that a diagnosis can hinder our mental health journeys, and 3 ways that a diagnosis can propel us forward in our healing.
How could a diagnosis hinder you?
#1: Over-Identifying with a Diagnosis
Some of us, when we receive a diagnosis, have a tendency to wear that diagnosis like a name tag. It suddenly becomes a part of who we are. This might be because we are relieved to finally have a better understanding of ourselves, and we want to embrace those answers! Or, it might be because the diagnosis feels heavy and we are scared that it now defines us. Either way, it is important to watch out for the tendency to over-identify with a diagnosis. You are not that diagnosis, and that diagnosis certainly does not embody everything that you are. There is so much more to you! A diagnosis is not a label; it is simply an explanation for certain patterns that are showing up in your life. It is there to help you move forward, not to hold you in place.
That being said, it is important to acknowledge that there are certain communities that choose to take great pride in their diagnosis, since they feel it is an important part of them. For example, the Autistic community often chooses to view their neurological differences as something to be embraced and celebrated. They are a great example of how differences can be meaningful and community-building. (We could also talk about whether these types of neurological differences should even be included in the DSM, but that’s a whole other conversation!)
#2: Buying Into the Stigma of Diagnosis
Next, diagnoses often carry stigmas. At times, I’ve had clients say things to me like, “I don’t want to be diagnosed with depression because then I’ll just be seen as that depressed person.” At this point, I often ask my clients, “So who is that depressed person? What beliefs do you have about depression that are making this idea so uncomfortable to you?” Whether it is because of stories we have heard, or because of people we have met, we often have preconceived notions about mental health challenges that make us feel icky about them ourselves. But it is important that we recognize – mental health experiences are simply human experiences! It is normal to have challenges, and these challenges look different from person-to-person.
It is also important to recognize that a diagnosis does not change what is already happening. If somebody is experiencing the symptoms of Bipolar I Disorder, simply receiving that diagnosis does not make those symptoms any more real. They were already there! It can, however, give you a better understanding of your experience and provide you with better direction for help.
#3: Limiting Yourself to the Symptoms
Another way that receiving a diagnosis can become limiting is when we believe that those symptoms are our end-all, be-all reality. It is very important to be self-aware, but there is a line where self-awareness can become self-consuming. When we see the symptoms of our diagnosis as walls that we can’t escape, we hold ourselves back from opportunities that could be really meaningful and fulfilling. Our symptoms might even begin to intensify when we become so hyper-aware of them. Instead, when we receive a diagnosis, we can learn how to appropriately challenge ourselves, and to push forward in the midst of our challenges. All the while, we can still practice a healthy dose of self-awareness that makes us more patient with ourselves when certain feelings and behaviors show up.
So how can a diagnosis help you?
#1: Extending More Patience and Kindness to Yourself
As previously mentioned, receiving an accurate diagnosis from a mental health professional often helps us to go a little easier on ourselves. Sometimes, simply understanding that there is a “reason” for the way we think, feel, and behave helps us to respond to ourselves more gently. For example, someone who is used to thinking, “Why am I so dumb and forgetful all the time?” may find it more helpful to say, “My ADHD sure makes it hard to remember things, but that’s okay! I'm going to write the important things down.” A diagnosis can give us more insight into our inner world and can prevent us from beating up on ourselves when the going gets tough.
#2: Helping Others to Better Understand
In a similar manner, a diagnosis can help those around us to better understand why we might function the way we do. While we cannot guarantee that others will always be patient and understanding, a diagnosis is an opportunity for those who care about us to step up and be more aware of our experiences. When we feel safe to do so, it can also give us a better foundation to advocate for ourselves. For example, an employee may say to their boss, “You might notice that my energy is a little lower than normal this week. Have you heard of premenstrual dysphoric disorder? I am currently learning to navigate it, and these are some things that help…” When we feel safe to do so, informing important people in our lives about a diagnosis can create environments where we can heal and grow.
#3: Providing Direction for Help
Finally, a diagnosis is there to make sense of your experience so that professionals can suggest the most effective routes for healing. Again, your diagnosis does not define you! It simply puts an easy-to-understand name to your experiences so that you don’t have to stay stuck. Instead, you can learn tools to build the kind of life you want, and you can receive the help and care you deserve.
Conclusion
To sum it all up, there are plenty of ways that a diagnosis could either hinder us or help us — many more than I can write about here! But the entire point of a diagnosis is to give us a compass for our growth. If you are currently trying to reconcile a diagnosis, you might find some of these insights to be helpful in that process.
It all comes down to one simple question: “Am I letting this diagnosis hold me in place, or am I letting it push me forward?” If you aren’t moving forward, there is plenty of help out there, including here at Arise Counseling Group. Our therapists can help you better understand your experiences and to take the next step forward.
-Kade Cope